Wednesday, May 24, 2006
Journey to Silence by meditation
I have committed to practice 15 minutes of meditation everyday M-F. This is my progress report and experience. The goal is to meditate for 15 minutes without interruption of thoughts.
5/24/06
I was able to meditate 88% of the time (at least 12 interruptions)
I realized 15 minutes is a long time when focused.
6/03/06 93% focused (al least 6 interruptions)
I had a revelation today. At one moment I was really being focused on my breathing and I really wanted to focus just on my breathing. All of a sudden, I felt I was scared of letting go to only one thing (my breathing). And yet, I felt the freedom of letting go. However, I wasn't really able to let go and just be one with my breathing.
The question is what and why am I afraid to let go?
6/22/06 95% focused (few interruptions)
I has rather unusual experience today. After six or seven minutes, I feel my body switch to a different mode. More like I feel a shock, but very dull and more focused. Also, I kept feeling specific part of my body. Once it was right between my elbow and shoulder, next one right in the middle of my thigh.
7/07/06 95% focused
I'm now more aware of my voice. I am focused on my breath, and at the same time to listen to my inner voice. Below the chatter of the noise, there is this saddle solid voice. To me it is my own God given voice. It says, who I am is, I am a child of God. Everything else is what I do, what I have and who I am being. In the core I am just a child of God.
7/19/06 90% focused
I have now increased the time to 20 minutes.
In general I am experiencing decrease of the chatter voice in my head. I am also clearer on what I want and don't want. I am a bit more spontaneous and upfront. I say what is in my head more often than I used to. Also, I am dreaming more about the future.
5/24/06
I was able to meditate 88% of the time (at least 12 interruptions)
I realized 15 minutes is a long time when focused.
6/03/06 93% focused (al least 6 interruptions)
I had a revelation today. At one moment I was really being focused on my breathing and I really wanted to focus just on my breathing. All of a sudden, I felt I was scared of letting go to only one thing (my breathing). And yet, I felt the freedom of letting go. However, I wasn't really able to let go and just be one with my breathing.
The question is what and why am I afraid to let go?
6/22/06 95% focused (few interruptions)
I has rather unusual experience today. After six or seven minutes, I feel my body switch to a different mode. More like I feel a shock, but very dull and more focused. Also, I kept feeling specific part of my body. Once it was right between my elbow and shoulder, next one right in the middle of my thigh.
7/07/06 95% focused
I'm now more aware of my voice. I am focused on my breath, and at the same time to listen to my inner voice. Below the chatter of the noise, there is this saddle solid voice. To me it is my own God given voice. It says, who I am is, I am a child of God. Everything else is what I do, what I have and who I am being. In the core I am just a child of God.
7/19/06 90% focused
I have now increased the time to 20 minutes.
In general I am experiencing decrease of the chatter voice in my head. I am also clearer on what I want and don't want. I am a bit more spontaneous and upfront. I say what is in my head more often than I used to. Also, I am dreaming more about the future.
